Internet Safety Tips for the Gnosiophobics
Let's face it, the internet can be a scary place! There's a lot of offense material out here on the digital wilderness and sometimes it can't be avoided! Some of it is grotesque and will cause you to lose your appetite. Some of it can even contradict or challenge your political and/or religious beliefs! That would be a shame, especially if you were unfortunate enough to have not developed a sense of humor. After all, no one wants to read opinions that are different than their own.
Luckily, some of it can be avoided by using two simple features on your browser!
Much like a car radio or television remote, your web browser is equipped with buttons to magically make those awful things disappear! Have you ever been flipping through channels on the radio dial and accidentally stop on Howard Stern? You poor thing. I bet your ears were assaulted with all sorts of offensive language and sound FX.
Did you know you can change the channel? It's easy! Instead of being subjected to Howard or the Presidential address or whatever might be offending you, just turn the dial or click the "channel" button on your radio/television.
This internet is like this too! If you accidentally begin to read something and get offended, don't be scared! Just click the "back" button and you'll return to your previous safe web page. I've included a helpful picture of what the "back" button looks like for your benefit.
In extreme circumstances, you may also want to try the "close window" button. This is a great button to use as it makes the entire internet disappear! No more dirty jokes and pictures. Included is another picture so you know what it looks like.
I hope these basics will help. Be careful. The internet is frighteningly unregulated and riddled with opinions and filthy jokes.